Ten

The thing I love most about blogging is sharing my story and having women contact me by comment, twitter or email and telling me that they are going through the exact same thing! It’s honestly what keeps me coming back, despite hectic schedules and random life stresses. If I can even help one person by sharing my struggles, then I will continue to share them forever.

My most recent “struggle” lately isn’t terribly serious, but it has caused a bit of anger/frustration/self-esteem issues. In the past few months, I’ve gained ten pounds. Ten pounds. My weight didn’t fluctuate at all for over two years and then all of a sudden it shot up awful quick.

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I know I talk about avoiding the scale as it’s not the true measure of health and worth. In that instance, I’m talking about the women who weigh themselves day after day, letting a 2lb fluctuating ruin their day and make them feel less than worthy. Our bodies and weights change constantly. Your weight can change 5lbs in one day without your body really changing at all. Hydration, workouts, sleep, food intake – all of this can cause minor changes which is usually just water weight. However, ten pounds in a few months – with visible body changes – is something entirely different.

If I wanted to make a list of excuses as to why I’ve gained weight it would look like this:

  • We’ve gone on 2 long trips and 2 weekend trips in the past two months (Hawaii, Denver, Denver, Arkansas). Being away from home makes it hard to workout and eat well.
  • After working so hard to get ready for Hawaii (and kind of giving up anyway) I wanted serious rest once we got home – and I gave it to myself. Lots of sleep and sleeping in.
  • My knee pain is worse than ever. I can’t run, lunge, jump, dance, hike or do elliptical without it hurting. Hell, sometimes I can’t even do low impact workouts without tweaking it. I seriously haven’t done any legitimate cardio in over two months. My workouts are less than half of what they used to be.
  • There’s a lot of little stresses in my life lately like house hunting, school, work, etc…Stress can easily make your body hold on to weight

If I wanted to be real about why I’ve gained weight and not have a whole list of excuses I would say:

  • I’ve been eating like shit (think whatever I want plus lots of processed foods/sugar/diet sodas) and I haven’t been exercising. I haven’t been drinking enough water either. I was able to get away with it for a bit but it most definitely caught up with me.

That’s it. The universe isn’t out to get me. A healthy lifestyle is not impossible even with stress and an injury. The plain and simple fact is that I haven’t been doing what I need to do in order to be healthy, feel good and maintain my weight. That’s it. Done and done.

Ten pounds isn’t the end of the world and with some lifestyle changes it should come off fairly easily. The fact is that I don’t feel good. I feel heavier (more than just physically, if that makes sense), more tired/fatigued, moodier and my digestion is just plain awful. Plus I can see the changes and I don’t like them. Acne is back and taking over my face and my skin seems a bit lackluster.

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I happen to think I look healthier in October as well, more of that healthy glow

So I’m resolving to straighten up and get my shit together. I’m not going to dive into a cleanse or a “slimdown” I’m just going to clean up my diet (diet as in what I eat, not diet as in restricting to lose weight) and figure out a fitness program that keeps me active without hurting my knee. I’m also going to really pressure my doc into fixing the damn thing by summer cause I miss running and can’t even think about not being able to hike! I’m going to be conscious about my water intake. I’m going to take my vitamins and avoid processed foods as much as possible. I’m going to try to replace sweet treats with fruit. I’m going to remember that a veggie burger and fries or some brownies and ice cream won’t hurt me (in fact, brownies make me really happy) as long as I’m not eating them multiple times per week.

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I was terrified to post this picture. But a good friend convinced me to go for it. I can’t believe I finally could see some upper abs and I let that go haha!

I’m going to remember that health is about a consistent effort. I’m going to take my own advice and live the lifestyle that I promote to others. I’m not going to set a date or a timeline or worry too much about the weight. I’m definitely not going to obsess about it and weigh myself morning noon and night. I’m not going on a diet and I’m not working out two hours a day. 

I imagine the pounds will come off as a pleasant side effect of improving my overall health – which is the whole point anyway. I will keep you updated and I will be posting my eating and workout guides along the way as motivation for myself and possible inspiration for others (I posted this week’s last night).

I’m slightly embarrassed to share this info with you all but it’s just a part of life. No biggie. Thank you for letting me share my journey with you guys – you really are the reason I come back day after day!

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7 thoughts on “Ten

  1. Let’s kick it back into gear together! I was having shin splints and haven’t run in 3 weeks, and have been eating junk, and I can feel it all over my body. I am responsible for my own health, and stress has let me believe that I deserved a break. And maybe I did. But I have also been responsible for a feeling of un-health, and that affects my entire well being. So I appreciate that you, someone who believes in herself and has had so much success in maintaining your health can also find yourself in a similar state from time to time. And I can only change me: only I can change me. I appreciate the inspiration to make that change! Also, reading a little book by Anne Lamott called “Help. Thanks. Wow.” and that’s helping some too. Short read. Recommend.

  2. Agree with everything – as usual. Lovely heartfelt post. That has been my journey over two years since our accident. I kept waiting to get “better” so I could be as active as I once was but it is not happening. I used it as an excuse but just two weeks ago I started eating clean – the way I used to and being as active as I can be. I feel great again and the pounds have started to come off. Like you – it isn’t much but I know what it is like to feel “light” in your whole life and I want that back. Thanks for sharing!

  3. First of all you still look amazing. Second of all, I completely understand and I can attest that even if you are still working out and eating right STRESS can wreak havoc on your weight, I’m still trying to work through my stress and even though I eat fairly well and do CrossFIT 3 times a week and yoga, it is coming back off, but VERY SLOWLY. I know you will turn this around and feel better again. You know its a viscious cycle.

  4. You are so flipping brave and HONEST for sharing. I know you are motivated to feel healthy again, and that is more important than losing weight. Sometimes I get overwhelmed with everything I want to change (eating, sleeping, exercises, etc.), but taking it day by day makes it seem more manageable. But please, give yourself a break: you still look GREAT, you and your family have been through a lot over the past few months, and everyone goes through healthy ups and downs. Keep it up friend! I know you can do it!
    PS: Have you tried swimming? Does cycling hurt your knee? I know how important breaking a sweat is to you, so I hope you find an activity that is pain-free!

  5. Pingback: Finally, Finally, Finally!! | Mile High Healthy

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